As I Am, Changing
A series of self-portraits in video and collage. As a native Californian living in New York for the first time, I was fascinated by the changing environment. The seasons became a complementary or contrasting background for me to present my evolving sense of self.
The longing to change can degenerate into an anxiety-driven obsession, manifested in the body turning against itself. Physical and psychological rest is playfully indulged, then painfully avoided or made almost impossible. Lasting transformation is often caused by indirect forces; a random discovery may outweigh a multitude of deliberate attempts. Some change, like the seasons, is only granted by the passing of time, and marks cyclical stages instead of linear progress.